║today my way║: New Year's resolutions

resolutions, new year, thoughts on things, todaymyway.com

Now that I have realized the discomfort from sitting on the fence, the turnaround in attitude is pretty obvious. Will it be a long read? Coffee-break subject at least? I'll be serious in short paragraphs and say silly things in others. I also realized it's December which makes my ramblings a bit more appropriate, like ending a chapter with a few wise thoughts not making much sense at times.

Am I moving forward? Am I hardly moving? I try to avoid posting articles revealing uncomfortable truths yet they are available exclusively between lines and behind highly pigmented lipstick. Just help yourselves whenever you please. Where do I start? I'm a person who avoids being busy, I get anxious when there is too many things going on yet I always plan to have hands full. I know, silly as my moves on the dancefloor. I've been spending days convinced the world is waiting with open arms for when I'm ready to go for it. I love challenges, new beginnings, first page of a freshly printed book but I have never allowed myself to see what’s on the next page and the one after it. I never happened to find out if there was a happy ending. I've been finding it easy to start off nicely but somehow in the process (and fairly quickly in that matter), I'm off the course. Off for a long time or for good. It's a super simple way to never achieve anything if you wanna take tips ;) Dreaming big while briefly focusing on living and enjoying life is what I do best. Worked it to perfection. It cannot end well, waiting for my ship to come instead of swimming out to it.

I took a very safe path but I won't announce to make every effort to keep my 2015 calendar busy, to be unstoppable to conquer every spare moment. It's not about days filled to the brim, it's about time filled with purpose. My hope is to try again, with excitement and a dose of anticipation in every most convenient time of my life. Celebrating a birthday in a season stuffed with so much meaning helps with organizing my head, prioritizing tasks, articulating resolutions. Hardly glamorous job when getting glammed up for the big night out but essential one for sure. I wanna make room for things I cannot quite verbally describe but which fall into other categories than weekly shopping or finding the best lipstick to suit my skin tone. No commitments, just prioritizing and hoping for the best. I'm very much looking forward to you new year, I really do. x

‘If you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never have it. If you don’t ask, the answer is always no. If you don’t step forward, you’re always in the same place.’ Nora Roberts

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First and foremost, thank you all for your New Year's wishes and visits while whirlwind of holiday season kept my mind occupied elsewhere. Mostly committed to enjoying days at every possible moment even though they shook me a little. Six days into the New Year enormity of resolutions made way before the clocks struck midnight are present in the air and keep everyone on their feet. Stepping expertly out of the old habits and excuses or seeking inspiration in uncertainty of days happened to land on my household agenda just in time to be joining in with a really wonderful group of ladies (do link up too, girls!). Biting into my share of promises has never been an easy process, my diaries are full of projects, objects, words and numbers. I never fail to plan big. This year I imagine throwing out a piece, a goal to make more space in focusing on a broader picture, view to be guided by and nothing more suitable comes to mind than making the most of what I already have and am. Before it grows late, becomes unimportant one midday. I don't need more time, more clutter, searching outside the box whilst inside is full of wonder. Noticing things that require effort and work has called for attention, a lot of time on my hands has had the achievement expectancy reduced to nil, to a page of a book a month, herbal tea every quarter, greeting the day before everybody else once in a blue moon. I've stayed attached to certain habits for too long and instead of mastering new hobby, awaiting the cloudless sky, sound of a chuckling baby, asking for opinion on opening verse of my novel rather than finishing lines brings more imprecise hopes than tackling what really needs to be tackled at any given time.

It so means there will be sure changes to the way I'm blogging, shockingly posts will appear more frequently (those consistent ladies really know how to do it right!), anything that turns a space into unconventional and inspiring is going to happen planned or not.

Now it's your turn! Tell me your goals or reflections for the new year! xx

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This blank notebook of a new year excites me like it hasn't happened before. It does every year, leave me and untouched day to a page diary alone and I'll have it all planed, pre-booked, organized to specific date and time. It just feels natural to be ecstatic and overwhelmed about something you know it's coming and you can make the most or the little of it. Anything. But nobody needs to know that. Only those who are involved I reckon. So, yeah welcome to day to a page of goals and playfulness. Some serious nerve-tingling events will mingle with everyday activities transforming them into something magical or just a little different which is especially good news as we've missed a few dates and ocassions this year. Nadia will take part in 'Alice in Wonderland' ballet performance on two days next July because movement of any kind is going strong around here since forever. This will be cute to watch and I'm inviting everyone like crazy. Grab yourself a glass of milk and consider being greatly entertained for about two hours straight.

The next paragraph will be a very domestic one about a house with white fences and children running among the heavily breeding trees. Sun will shine through the open patio doors while I sit watching frilly skirts floating before my eyes. Or so I want to. I’ve been bragging around about a massive urge to move out to a house of ours (semi-detached, terraced, doesn’t matter) for a long time. Maybe it’s far more urgent because I've never experienced a proper home or my own space as my family was moving from place to place, I kept changing schools like Kim Kardashian changes her outfits. On good days my space would consist of a half of a family table with the other half for my younger brother. I gave a lot of thought to renting properties because they’re not bad option to consider. If we’re lucky we could find a decent size house with rear garden and being close to main streets and the beach. If it’s unfurnished, the better. And if the landlord is not too much of a jerk, we can decorate rooms as we please. Even yesterday owning a house was a big deal for us (me), today I’m much laid-back about the whole buying idea especially that we’re not huge money savers. I’d rather spend that extra cash on trips, food or little clothes so yeah, mentally preparing myself for journeys through estate agencies to get that new space under our wings.

I think it’s going to be an exciting year. (Shhh... happy almost Christmas, friends...)

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Daily whirlwinds have been eating away every spare minute I possess, no wonder I incidentally realized we've already reached beginning of February. Because of uncontrolled ritual of being late with my New Year's resolutions throughout (most of) my adult life, unlike previous years I have decided not to make plans just for the sake of having something to be attached to for a year. I could easily get a fair amount of creative flow of resolutions at the end of festive season but among things that pass by at the speed of light I may pick just three and repaint into my signposts for 11 months ahead - those I'm looking forward to the most! (according to current state of mind and mood ;) So...

1. Reaching a whole new level of prioritizing I'm looking forward to enjoy the simplest of things: the present! In all forms and weathers: cozying up with a good book, running with energetic toddler until next game request, stroking her warm forehead for extra long before bedtime and not trading it for anything! (and undeniably having more sushi).

2. When did I realize that seasons stay only for a short while? Not making the most of them is a true crime, so I'm looking forward to welcome each day of a new time of a year enjoying it as it explodes with colours and sounds! (and try not to get home bound due to weather conditions).

3. Time is precious, shall I cancel my magazine subscription? I am definitely looking forward to get active: train, swim, push up - you get the sweaty picture.

Let's make our New Year's resolutions 'Things we're looking forward to' even if it means going to the gym twice a week.

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